"Hi Jeemun, would you do a YouTube video or blogpost on friendships and loneliness? I know that I, and many others would be interested. X"
Thank you for writing in! I've made a video and a vlog post for ya!
In life we have ups and downs, and loneliness is something that everyone goes through at some point in their life.
One way I feel helps me cope with loneliness is the idea of keeping yourself busy
and focusing on yourself, it’s always easier said than done but once you begin
that mental process it becomes a lot easier.
For example supposing
you had a friend or partner that you recently fell out with and stopped
speaking to.
The lonely feeling
usually kicks in because you had made that person your be all and end all, at
some point in your life you relied on them to bring you up from a bad
situation, or they would be the person that would usually take your mind off of
something. Meaning that once they are gone you suddenly have this void, like
there now isn’t anyone to confide in or provide that escape for you.
It can be such a
harsh reality and I get that, but everything is a process.
Over the years I’ve
learnt to be comfortable in my own space but it was such a hard process that I
look back on and am so grateful to have gone through, learning to be ok with
being in your own space starts from learning about yourself, who are you
really?
I had spent many years always being someones girlfriend and pleasing
that person, so when they left my life I was having such a hard time being
comfortable and understanding who I even was, So when that feeling of
loneliness crept in it felt horrible, and I would sit there and think what
could I be doing instead of feeling like this and I started to fill up that
time with leaving the house and going to the gym, I love fitness, I picked up
skating I made loads of new friends to skate with every Tuesday and Thursday.
You have to
fill up that void with finding something positive to do, before you know it a
week has passed then a month and it’s just automatic, you don’t tend to have
that empty feeling anymore because your mind is craving that fun activity
again.
Picture it this way,
imagine that person walked back into your life, but because you are so self
sufficient you realize you don’t actually NEED that person, you don’t really
NEED anyone, it’s much better to want someone in your life, you tend to be in a
better state of mind when you choose to make time for someone, rather than be
so heavily immersed in that person you aren’t living your own life.
It’s also much
more attractive for you to be a career driven person who is very sure of
themselves, you know what you like and don’t like, you know what you will or will
not tolerate from another person. And you know how you want another person to
make you feel. People should be an asset to your life not a hindrance.
Friendship wise
You have to adopt the
mentality (as harsh as it sounds) that people come and go out of your life and
they will forever, with that being said you have to be careful who you put your
trust in and who you invest your time into, people will hurt you but it’s who
is worth being hurt for?
Have friends around
you that can feed your creative mind, I love when I have an idea and can pitch
it to a friend and they help get me excited about it and can even pitch in
ideas to help make it better! What more could you ask for?
How I personally cope with life
I find personally that I need stability in my life, my parents are a stable figure and I confide in my mum with a lot of my personal struggles and I turn to my dad a lot for advice and to be honest my parents are the only people that can actually have me crying of laughter they know exactly how to make me laugh they really are my best friends, I'm lucky in the sense that I have them and I am very grateful as I know not everyone has this. It's taken a lot of growing up and learning who my parents are as people that have helped me in terms of getting along with them and actually forming a relationship.
Forgiveness
If you have a friend
that’s done you wrong in the past just forgive them believe me life is too
short, and you don’t need to be going through life carrying that burden because
you actually are..whether you are willing to accept that or not, you will be better off
for it, trust me, I had a friend that got busy with my dude that I was madly in
love with, It took me two years but I became a born again Christian and forgave
her. Once that was done I now find that nothing from anyone bothers me the same way. I don’t hold grudges I’m a very live in the moment kind of person, I take
everything for what it is and move on.
Moving on
You can meet people
in the most random of circumstances I met someone at the police pound the other
day, fancy bonding with someone in such a situation! But I believe
God wouldn’t let me go through something without the intention of having me
grow through it.
The best way to combat the feeling of loneliness
is becoming self sufficient. - Jee
Thank you for reading
God Bless
Jee
x
No comments:
Post a Comment